Steve, please try Microsoft Dynamics, OK?

April 13, 2007 John Obeto

Newsflash: Apple delays OS X 'Leopard' till later in 2007 as a result of bodies sent to work on iBrick.

Apple, Inc.
1 Infinite Loop
Cupertino, California

Dear Steve,

I heard today that you have delayed the release of Leopard until October because your drones are working on the ~~iBrick~~ iPhone.

Now, pundits are using this as an opportunity to pile on.

Forsooth, some writers are even comparing you to those philistines in Redmond.

Like you, I am upset.

However, I have the perfect solution for you: Microsoft Dynamics.

The Microsoft Dynamics suite of enterprise resource planning products would have eased, indeed, allowed you to avoid this mess entirely.

While it is out of the space we work in, if you give me a call, I will be glad to connect you with someone at Microsoft Business Solutions who would make ERP problems at Apple, Inc. a thing of the past.

Sincerely,

John Obeto.

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I mean, can you imagine the package on this guy? He must have balls made of Ununoctium (atomic number 118) or some other heavier, yet-undiscovered element!

Check out the past misdeeds:

iTunes ships with virus: “We blame Microsoft for not making Windows more hardy against viruses…..”
iTunes incompatible with Vista™: “Windows Vista’s release crept up on us so suddenly, we were not able to develop for it on time” or some drivel like that, despite 100 million sold.

And now this?

I really don’t blame him. When you think of the number of media harlots who make a living feeding at the teats of the nonsense machine that is the Steve Jobs Show,you then get a sense of why he comes up with sh*t like this.

If only Microsoft talked down to users like this, the money I could make……..